I try not to get too personal with this blog, but some things have been happening in my life and I don’t think it’s just some random coincidence. So I did some research and I found the connection. It’s like totally terrifying…and stuff. No cap.
First, I’ve had some really bad acne over the last few months. I’ve tried lots of things to get rid of it but nothing has worked. I have just gotten used to it I guess but it still really sucks. So I finally found out it’s not really my fault at all, there’s like nothing I can even do about it. I feel a little better I guess but I still have all of these pimples - eeewww.
I’ve also been noticing a lot more hair in my hair brush. Like, I used to maybe clean it out every few weeks I guess. But now it’s like twice a week. I’ve been taking vitamins and everything…I just was confused and didn’t know what was going on? Well now I know. I guess climate change is going to just make me bald soon. Nooooooo!
I also was in car accident a few weeks ago. Like this guy just literally came crashing into me. Like wtf?
I have also had to use a lot of Pepto lately, like I’m just spending way too much time on the toilet. Squirt, squirt - if you know what I’m saying. I thought maybe it was a gluten thing so I totally went raw vegan and stuff (subsequent hair loss unrelated to eating like a literal bird) but it like is still happening. Now I know there is like, nothing I can even do and it’s so depressing. Climate change is totally ruining my life!!!!!
Speaking of depressing, I also just keep forgetting stuff a lot and like…I just feel really anxious and stuff. Like…really? This too?!?!
Of course, if all this isn’t enough for one person to handle…I was just walking in the park earlier this week (I had to take the bus because my car is smashed), just trying to get a little exercise and sunshine in between my squirting into the toilet, cleaning my hairbrush and putting Clearasil on my acne. And this dog just like came up to me and totally bit me on my leg. It’s owner didn’t even have it on a leash! The guy kept apologizing and said his dog never acted like that before. So now the dog decides to bite someone and it has to be me!
My life sucks so bad rn and it’s all because of climate change - obviously. I’m just going to go join Extinction Rebellion and become a NEET because, like, why does it even matter at this point. Unless I get cancer and have a heart attack first.
LMFAO!!!! I love it!
Now I know why I had cancer last year! Climate Change! Why didn’t my doctor tell me any of this???? Don’t they teach this in medical school?
This is gold